Today, we’re celebrating your backside! Yes, this post is all about love for your butt. So before you continue, let’s do something together. Take three deep breaths, and on each exhale, unclench your butt… I’ll wait…
How did that feel? It’s amazing how much tension we can unknowingly hold in our bodies, especially down there. Whether or not you’re planning to explore anal play, it’s always a good idea to check in with your body, get familiar, and give those muscles some well-deserved relaxation.
You can take that tidbit and move on with your day, or read on for some myth-busting fun facts and playful tips in honor of Anal August.
A Quick Story… Recently, I stumbled upon a post in a Facebook group where a woman was seeking advice on how to enjoy anal sex. The amount of judgment and misinformation in the comments had me reeling.
One person said, “If you have to ask for tips, then it’s probably not for you,” as if we should all just naturally know how to enjoy any sexual activity without ever learning new skills.
Another person claimed, “It’s more than just the kitty that gets wet,” suggesting that the rectum self-lubricates like the vagina does – ma’am, respectfully, it does NOT!
Don’t be a victim of misinformation. Let’s bring this taboo topic into the sunshine so we can all shine brighter.
Why Anal August? August is dedicated to education and celebration of anal play. Regardless of your gender or orientation, we all have a butt, and it can add pleasure for anyone. Butt… often we have big fears, misconceptions, and shame around our butts- and I used to, too. Until my early 20s, when I read the book Anal Pleasure and Health by Jack Morin. I highly recommend it to anyone curious about anal play who enjoys reading.
If all you do during this Anal August is feel a little warmer and friendlier towards your butt, then I’m a happy sexologist. But if you want more pleasure back there, on the giving or receiving end, then read on for more of the basics for safe + sexy play.
Butt Stuff: What You Need to Know
- Your anus has fabulous nerve endings: People of all genders have butts, and anal play can be pleasurable for anyone, regardless of gender or orientation. Enjoying anal play does not change who you’re attracted to, or your masculinity or femininity. You’re welcome ; )
- Comfort is key: Getting comfortable with the idea of anal play is crucial for pleasure. If you’re tense, worried, or feeling ashamed, it’s hard to relax and enjoy.
- It’s not just about penetration: Anal play offers a variety of sensations. Explore different toys for different experiences. (Psst… Get 15% off your purchase of anal toys from Good Vibes!)
- Lube is your best friend: For any kind of anal play, whether you’re giving or receiving, lubrication is essential. The anus doesn’t self-lubricate, so make sure to add plenty of high-quality lube like this one. (Silicone-based lubes are ideal for anal play, unless you’re using a silicone toy. Silicone lubes are safe to use with condoms.)
- Arousal needed: Being very turned on before approaching the anus can make the experience more comfortable and pleasurable. Arousal helps relax the muscles. Always take it slow.
- Flared-base toys only: Things can get lost in the rectum- and no one wants that emergency room visit! Always use toys designed for anal play; they have a flared base so they don’t slip in further than they’re meant to.
- Pain is a no-go: Anal play should never hurt. It will feel different- maybe weird, maybe even minor discomfort for a moment (slow slow slow!), but it is a form of play that’s becoming more popular because it can feel really GOOD, not painful. Don’t use numbing creams, and listen to your body. If you experience pain, stop and adjust or call it a day. Pleasure is worth the time and care it takes to do it safely.
- Mess-free oral without the worry: Interested in oral-anal play, but you don’t want to stress about bacteria or sexually transmitted infections? Try these innovative latex undies! Use the code SEXISTENTIALCOACH at checkout for a discount.
Want to Learn More? If you want a private, confidential 1:1 consultation on toys or more about anal play, book it here.
Happy August, and don’t forget to breathe and unclench!
*This post contains some affiliate links, which allow me to earn a small commission at no cost to you. I’m an affiliate for companies and small businesses that I strongly support, offering products I believe in. A win-win for a more shame-free world. Thank you!